Suddenly Single & Thriving

 When your life suddenly implodes, it can be hard to know where to go to find support.  Of course, you can talk to people in your real life--friends, family, pastors, church family.  While they mean well and they will love you through it, sometimes it can feel like they just don't get it.  And sometimes they get tired of hearing you hash things out.   I found my place on  Instagram .  Not only did I find a number of accounts to follow, but I also was able to share things about my life and get it out there. It helped to find people who were going through similar things that I could learn from.   Here are some accounts I have found helpful: Inspirational:   Toby Mac Speak Life :  Life quotes, mostly Christian, encouraging. The Single Woman :  Mandy Hale, writer.  Her books are so helpful and encouraging.  And her posts are funny and very relatable.  Narcissism: Narcissist Recovery :  Posts about narcissism  Petra Van Deijil :  Emotional abuse and narcissism Betrayal Trauma Recovery B

  One thing that worked for me was to keep a list of all the new things I did in that first year.  I'd never run a household completely on my own, or cared for the kids alone, or made huge life decisions without a partner.  (of course, now I'd argue that I actually did all those things on my own before, but I had another person in my orbit who seemed to be there with me.) I decided to keep a list on my phone of everything I did that I hadn't done before.  I added new things to the list for the full 12 months after he left.  Here's what it looked like: -got oil changed--on my mom's car as I didn't have a vehicle after he left and she lent me hers. -got my own car--I've never had a car where I was the sole driver -took car to mechanic--also got my own mechanic  -jump started a car--with the help of the lovely lady across the street  -turned off the furnace -turned on the air conditioner -called a repair person for the air conditioner -learned how to clean the